Best Insults Without Cursing?

Put down your best insults without cursing.

• I'd slap you, but that'd be animal abuse.
• We all have the right to be stupid, but you abuse the privilege.
• What is that smell? Oh it's you.

 

omg @Devin610 please share some
inspiration

 

"Oh there goes your pretty face! Wait.. You don't have one. "- Peter from Divergent

 

Spoiler: WARNING

Please do not actually use the insults.

Source:
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100314094442AAcycFW

 

I love this one.
"I'd challenge you to a battle of wits, but you seem unarmed."

 

Im jealous of all the people that haven't met you!
I wasn't born with enough middle fingers to tell you how I feel about you
You must have been born on a highway because that is where most accidents happen
I bet your brain seems as good as new, seeing that you never use it.
Your so ugly when your mom dropped you off at school she got a fine for littering.
Two wrongs don't make a right, take your parents as an example.
I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and poop out a smarted statement then that.
If I wanted to kill myself I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ.
Your family tree must be a cactus because everyone on there is a prick.
If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world!
I don't exactly hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water, i'd drink it.
It's better to let someone think your an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.
Shutup, you'll never be the man your mother is.
Somewhere out there is a tree, tirelessly producing oxygen so you can breath. I think you owe it an apology
You shouldn't play Hide and Seek, no one would look for you.

k i have more but thats enough for now.

Im pretty sure he said best insults WITHOUT cursing xd

 

Better? xD

 

Spork?

 

you're such a nut balloon *hugs*

 

youre as straight as a circle

 

Little on the homophobic side...

 

Its an insult remember, im not against homosexuality lol
I didnt even make it

 

Fair point.

 

"Thy tongue outvenoms all the worms of Nile."
From Shakespeare's play, Cymbeline.

 

The mirror insults me every day

 

Back in Shakespearean times, "Prince of Wales" was the worst insult that could ever be said.

 

You look tired. Are you sick? Do you need an aspirin? You look like a ghost.


(basically telling that person they look like poo without being mean)

 

You black man (you know the original word)

 

I’m jealous of all the people that haven't met you!

You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen.

You bring everyone a lot of joy, when you leave the room.

Haha, I didn't make any of these up, but they are pretty funny.