Hello everyone, I just wanted to rant a bit. No one in real life really has the time to listen to me, so I don't mind if you don't help. It would be really appreciated though. So, I'm in year 7 - grade 7 - (whatever, I'm from Australia and we call grades years; anyways.) It's term/semester 3 and back in semester 1, a girl and me were good friends. We were friends because of mutual interests and youtube interests - like Roblox trollers and we had a very similar interest in vines. Anyways, in term 2, she had a new friend. We'll call her Ivy. Ivy was pretty, kind but also really bossy and protective; that's what I learned from her. She acts really kind but sneakily will separate me and my friend (we'll call her Mary). Ivy and Mary became really close and I eventually kind of got ditched. Not entirely, but they grew closer and I was more distant. Ivy was pretty manipulative. Whenever we'd go to a class with free seating, she'd sit in-between me and Mary so we couldn't sit next to each other. I'm fine with having more friends - the more the merrier, right? But she was just really rude and bossy and I couldn't stand it. Another thing is that she'd ignore me. Everyone in our class says hello to each other in the mornings but she avoids everyone and goes up to Mary. Super rude. I tried saying hello, she looked at me and doesn't say anything. Then she talks to Ivy again. What the hell? How immature do you need to be to not say a one word sentence. Come on. She's older than me too - I'm supposed to be in a grade lower and she's supposed to be more mature. I guess older people are more mature but not in this case. We were assigned a sport assignment and she would always do everything. I didn't get any turns of flipping, doing rolls, handstands, cartwheels, the splits, anything. She would always do them and I never got a turn. It was because she was ''lightest'' is what she'd say, but that doesn't mean I couldn't do anything. I'm nothing but a few pounds heavier than her. It kind of made me angry that she was being this way towards me. She is very exclusive and rude to me but an angel to Mary. This got to a point where I booked an interview with my PE teacher. We were currently learning about types of bullying and I was certain Ivy was doing a type of bullying. This is called ''indirectly'' bullying. However, my teacher couldn't be present so I didn't have the chance. Anyways, comment your opinions. Should I make another interview or see what happens next? Maybe see if a teacher can witness this behaviour. Thank you for reading!
So I really feel for you and I understand where you are coming from completely. My first piece of advice is not to talk to the teachers about this because if the teachers confronted Ivy I think it would just escalate the issue. If you need someone to talk to, talk to us or talk to your parents, I never liked to do it until I realized my parents were very similar to me. As for Mary, as long as you continue to treat her like you used to she may come to become close to you again and hell if she doesn’t just go hang out with other people because if she doesn’t want to be friends with you that is her problem. Anyways goodluck!
This is something I relate a lot to. When I am in these kinds of situations, I tend to just leave that group of friends and join a new one. I don't see any point in having a friendship that is toxic because of another party that is disrespectful towards you. When you'll leave that group is when you'll see if you really mattered for Mary. As hard as this sounds, if she comes back to you, it means you mattered for her and if she doesn't, then find people who care about you more than she does. That doesn't mean to start drama with her; just silently walk away from that group. If someone questions it, be honest: "I didn't feel welcome in this friends group anymore". I don't think talking to teachers is necessary, nor is drama. What I've learned from every relationship in life, whether it's your friend, your significant other or your boss, is that when someone needs time for themselves, you need to give them time to wander around. They will come back to you if you matter for them. It's important to keep a good balance of push and pull in every relationship in life. This situation seems very bad, good luck :/
I agree a lot with @hmj. You should always branch out and maybe try to find another friend group if you're having trouble with your current friend group. If you leave you current friend group, then you will see if you really mattered to Mary. If she acts the same to you as before, then you will have made a good choice because that relationship will have gone nowhere but downhill. If it turns out she wants you back as her friend, then you have made a good choice because you will be friends with her again. There really isn't much point in talking to a teacher because in my experiences, it doesn't help.
If done under the condition of strict confidentiality this shouldn't be a problem, as long as you trust your teacher to keep it to themselves. Can't give any advice better than above otherwise.
