Don't be too bossy

I've seen this several times before.
So the topic of this thread is 'don't be too bossy'. If you don't know what I mean, keep reading, I'll explain shortly.

We all want respect, we all want to be admired, so we started being too bossy towards people. What I mean by bossy is replying on threads with a bossy/mean reply. Sure, it makes you look "smarter" or "more serious" but have you ever thought what does the person you sent the reply to feels like?

Take this for example:

Someone wrote a staff apply, and you want to give him/her tips on how should they improve it.
Now, I wrote two different replies, which basically has the same meaning, but they just look different.

Reply #1:

This application is pretty bad, I doubt the staff would choose you.
If you want a chance of being accepted, add more infomation, and get rid of these smilies, it makes it look silly and chilidhs.

Good luck.

Reply #2:

This application has potential, just add more information and remove the smilies to make it look more formal.

Good luck! :)

Now, which reply do you think was less offensive? Number 2 of course. Sure, writing a reply like number 1 makes you look smarter like I stated above, but it's kinda mean. Let's just say you won't approach to someone in real life and criticize his drawing for example in a bossy way.

What I'm trying to say is, no one likes mean and bossy people, and even if it makes you look smarter, don't do that. Yes, I was quite bossy a few weeks ago but I changed. I started being nice towards people. That doesn't mean you can be less serious, there's a difference between serious and bossy. Just don't be too serious.

Thank you for your time,

~Vaicun.

 

We are just stating our opinion
Posting a reply like that isn't bossy nor mean. If you want feedback on your app you don't want bullshit like :" omg this is perfect"
If you want feedback , you should know you most likely will get replies like :" Just use less color, it looks like a rainbow. And remove the smilies, it looks childish"
If you can't handle criticism, then why make one anyways?

 

There's a difference between writing "omg this is so perfect" and writing a nice response.

What I meant is, try make your replies more nicer, and not something mean like "this is really bad" because it just makes the person that the reply was meant for him/her feel bad.

 

+20

Anyway, I feel that this thread was kind of directed towards me, because lately my replies have been often critical of others. The problem is, it's hard to make them both positive in tone and representative of my honest opinion. Also, I feel like my way is a better way to make new members more mature, because members being immature is one of my least favorite things. But I will take that into consideration when dealing with obviously new members, becuase you often don't know whether they can handle criticism or not. Speaking of which, people not being able to handle criticism is also extremely annoying, criticism is a part of life. That's what I miss about Spaghetti - he was freely willing to criticize, which was a good thing in my opinion.

Also, before you say "OMG THIS IS A FLAME WAR LOCK IT", people disagreeing on something is NOT the same as a flame war. It's only a flame war if people flame each other (i.e. personal attacks due to different opinions).

 

Free willi
Jk

But you have a point.
If someone would reply on your app like this :" Remove the colors blabla" that is also constructive criticism , because you're trying to , well, help. It really is annoying when people can't accept criticism.
Not everything is supposed to be ' the land of magical unicorns with rainbows and flowers'
Ok , I have no idea what I just said. But I mean you can't always give it a positive tone.

 

No, it's directed to no one. I've just seen this a few times before (and even got some messages like these) and I know how bad can some people feel if people are replying like that.

I didn't say people shouldn't accept criticism. They should, the only thing that matters is the way you criticize it.

 

Neither did I.
They just can't accept any kind of criticism. So if they can't , they shouldn't make one. Simple solution.
Learn to accept it ir don't make one at all

 

Using reply number one, you are saying that it's bad, yes. It's quite offensive in ways, however it's also a good thing. If people are new at making staff application, you should be strict and straight to the point. You won't be taken so seriously if you're so polite to people all the time. It's constructive criticism and it teaches the creator of said app to make it better. Even if it hurts their feelings, they will tend to understand that there are some mean people out there. If the staff application is bad, just say it. The person will understand and change it accordingly. After while, the application will change and they'll have a better chance at getting accepted.

Note that this is my personal opinion.

 

There's a different sense of urgency with "you should", and "you need", the latter being less polite, but displays more "importance". If you always say "you should", people will just think its an option with little significance, and say "but I don't want to".

If people are offended by a bit of constructive criticism, why are they even applying for staff?