Make me say some stuff.

I'm really bored, so let's imagine for a second that I'm like the Tyrone meme.

Reply and give me something to say and I'll record an audio file of me saying it and post it on the forums via vocaroo. If it's too long I might cut it down a bit or if I don't want to do it it'll just be some form of me saying "No." Also please keep it appropriate because this is the forums.
I'm anxious to see the replies lol.

EDIT: I might be a bit slower doing these than I'd like because ideally I want to be home alone.
Less distractions and my family won't be more concerned for my mental health than they already are lol

 

I LOVE ITS JERRY AND HARRY

idfk lol sorry if its cringy but oh well

 

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0r1MDCUDFBo

 

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Apache” and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

 

You would not believe your eyes
If ten million fireflies
Lit up the world as I fell asleep
'Cause they'd fill the open air
And leave tear drops everywhere
You'd think me rude
But I would just stand and stare

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems

'Cause I'd get a thousand hugs
From ten thousand lightning bugs
As they tried to teach me how to dance
A foxtrot above my head
A sock hop beneath my bed
The disco ball is just hanging by a thread
(Thread, thread...)

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems
(When I fall asleep)

Leave my door open just a crack
(Please take me away from here)
'Cause I feel like such an insomniac
(Please take me away from here)
Why do I tire of counting sheep?
(Please take me away from here)
When I'm far too tired to fall asleep
(Ha-ha)

To ten million fireflies
I'm weird 'cause I hate goodbyes
I got misty eyes as they said farewell
(Said farewell)
But I'll know where several are
If my dreams get real bizarre
'Cause I saved a few and I keep them in a jar
(Jar, jar, jar...)

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems
(When I fall asleep)

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep
Because my dreams are bursting at the seams

 

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

Well the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So much to do so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

[Chorus:]
Hey now you're an All Star get your game on, go play
Hey now you're a Rock Star get the show on get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold

It's a cool place and they say it gets colder
You're bundled up now but wait 'til you get older
But the meteor men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the satellite picture

The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
The waters getting warm so you might as well swim
My world's on fire how about yours
That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored

[Repeat Chorus 2x]

Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas
I need to get myself away from this place
I said yep what a concept
I could use a little fuel myself
And we could all use a little change
Well the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb
So much to do so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

 

Sing O Canada and yes the full english version plz

 

How can you see into my eyes, like open doors
Leading you down into my core
Where I've become so numb,
Without a soul
My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there and lead it back
Home
Wake me up, wake me up inside, I can't wake up,
Wake me up inside, save me,
Call my name and save me from the dark, wake me up
Bid my blood to run, I can't wake up
Before I come undone, save me
Save me from the nothing I've become
Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me
Breathe into me and make me real, bring me
To life
Wake me up, wake me up inside I can't wake up,
wake me up inside, save me,
call my name and save me from the dark, wake me up
Bid my blood to run, I can't wake up
Before I come undone, save me
Save me from the nothing I've become
Bring me to life, I've been living a lie
There's nothing inside, bring me to life
Frozen inside without your touch
Without your love, darling
Only you are the life among the dead
All this time, I can't believe I couldn't see
Kept in the dark, but you were there in front of me
I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
I've got to open my eyes to everything
Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul
Don't let me die here
There must be something wrong, bring me to life
Wake me up, wake me up inside, I can't wake up,
Wake me up inside, save me,
Call my name and save me from the dark, wake me up
Bid my blood to run, I can't wake up
Before I come undone, save me
Save me from the nothing I've become
Bring me to life, I've been living a lie,
There's nothing inside, (Bring me to life) Bring me to life

 

Every day I think about potatoes. From the minute I wake up to the minute all I think about is potatoes. I don't even care what form they're in, they can be mashed, sweet, baked, in a soup or in the form of french fries. The only thing I ever eat all day is potatoes, and nothing else. I only drink potato based beverages. I go to sleep with potatoes. I wake up every morning to the smell of potatoes running through the house, and have a healthy breakfast of guess what? That's right fuckin' potatoes. I pray to potatoes every morning and every night before I go to bed. Every bath instead of shampoo and body wash I use potatoes., while I bathe in potatoes. For lube when I masturbate I use potatoes. I think I would honestly die without potatoes like an Irishman in the late 1840's. Potatoes are the best thing to ever stand on the face of this universe.

 

fuck me daddy

 

The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

 

Can't you idiots read.
I'll still do them later though lmao

 

What do you find inappropriate in them lol

 

Just the amount of language especially in Harry's lol